Choices: What Do We Do With Them?

So I’m still thinking a lot about choices.

I believe that the ability to choose is a very good thing. It allows us to build our lives as we see fit. It empowers. With it we can learn, expand, grow and ultimately we can become better human beings.

However, the blessings of choice do not come without a cost.

If I choose one option over another, then the one I didn’t choose ceases to exist. What if I make the wrong choice? What if the choice I make turns out to have consequences I didn’t foresee? What if I discover that there was a better choice that I somehow missed?

When I make a choice, I become responsible for that choice. That fact can, at times, be overwhelming and downright terrifying.

So what do we do when faced with one of those choices that strike terror in our hearts? How do we handle the overwhelming realization that we have the power to choose and within that power lies both the potential for glory and the potential for destruction?

There are four ways in which we can approach a particular choice. Let’s take a minute and examine each one and see which is the best way to deal with any specific choice we might face.

1. We can avoid or evade it.

   This is actually nothing more than the path of least resistance. It’s the Scarlett O’Hara approach to life — “I’ll think about it tomorrow.” It’s living by default.

   This may appear to be the easiest way to deal with a choice, but it is also the most disempowering and destructive.

   I’ve said this before. When we avoid or evade a choice, then someone else will make it for us and that person may not have our best interests in mind.

   Avoiding or evading a choice pretty much guarantees that we’ll miss out on building and living the life we truly want.

2. We can rely on experts.

   This approach is a little better than living by default. At least it involves some action on our part. We’re not just letting things happen.

   The problem with this approach is that it still disempowers us. It relies on solely external sources and thus we give our personal power away to someone else.

   Certainly there are times when we need additional information to make a good choice. At those times it’s important to seek out advice or information from those more experienced than we are. But to rely solely on their advice or dictates, is to live someone else’s life not our own.

3. We can go with our gut.

   A lot of people take this option. It’s called flying by the seat of your pants. It’s doing what feels right and sometimes that’s simply the best we can do.

   I don’t believe, however, that this option should have supremacy. It leaves too much up to chance.

   In a world full of hurricanes, earthquakes, tornados, tidal waves and many other disastrous acts of destruction, do you really want to take a route that relies solely upon random chance?

   I realize that sometimes taking a shot in the dark is the only option we have. We don’t have enough information and the choice needs to be made immediately. But these situations are much rarer than we’d like to think. I believe that there is a better way to approach choice than simply closing our eyes and throwing the dart.

4. We seek advice, wisdom and use our own power of rational thought.

   To me, when possible, this is always the best approach to take when faced with a choice.

   This approach preserves our autonomy. It allows for the fact that we may not have all the facts or information we need. It reduces the influence of random chance. It is the diametrical opposite of living by default.

   This is the hardest, yet most rewarding of all the approaches to choice. It’s hard because it doesn’t remove the responsibility of making a poor choice. Yet it is the most rewarding when we make a good life-enhancing choice.

   This choice will alway be the one that enhances our self confidence, even when we make a choice that didn’t work out as we planned. That’s because we made the effort to do the best we possibly could do and we can learn from our mistakes. This allows us to hold our head up high and know that we didn’t run from what was difficult.

The power of choice is an awesome power. With it you can build the life of your dreams. Abdicate it and you’ll be relegated to a life of drudgery, victimization and dull grayness. Don’t let that become your reality. Exercise your right and ability to choose.

How have you exercised your right to choose? What process do you use to make a difficult choice? When are you most tempted to give up your power of choice? I’d like to hear your thoughts. You can leave them in the comment section below.

Photo Credit: flickr user ell brown